soulful sunday morning.

sunday souful morning read. {my post from instagram yesterday.}

{Best article I’ve read on Joy Williams and the break up of The Civil Wars duo}

Please go read entire piece, but have to share some of my favorite words from Joy Williams on her band break up, her father’s recent death, and how it all affected her attitude towards God, her husband, and life. Ready for the album.  

“I think you can never plan for life to change.  It seldom works out the way you think it will….It felt very much like an untethering. When you get untethered, you also get more free in a way that I would have never realized I needed, had I not gone through the crucible of all those things at the same time. It’s made me more grateful for what I have. It’s made me more brave….

There’s this question of how do I grow in the depths of belief and still remain open to how connected everything is and how connected everyone is? How do I learn to be more present in this moment? That’s when awe and wonder really start to grow. To me, those are the seeds of awareness, the seeds of belief, the seeds of so many things—wonder and curiosity.

I’m reminded that the way I view the world and the way I view things in life, it does actually resemble nature in that so many things have to work together for something to grow….Certain things have to die away for new growth to happen.

I think in making this record, I couldn’t look away from everything that had happened. To look away and create something other, that would have been completely disingenuous. I had to stare into the darkest parts, and the scariest places, and the places I felt like I was drowning in, in order to find a new way to live. I feel like the things that mattered the most to me deepened because of having to fight for it. I think I learned to let go of the things that don’t serve me.”

She recounts a conversation with her producer, where he said:

 ‘I really love the music you’ve made, but we’re sitting here because you’ve told me there’s more you want to say.  We’ve been writing for the last hour and a half, and I don’t really feel like you’re free to say it. Why are you so afraid to just say it? You’re so afraid to say something wrong, you’re at risk of saying nothing at all.’ 

She continues, “That’s when I started ugly-girl crying. I really needed that moment.  I’m a little bit of a reluctant artist. In order for me to write, I have to stick my own hand down my throat to get a pulse.  It’s not a very comfortable feeling. But it felt like the only authentic way to go about doing it.

I think what I’ve learned is that the most pain I’ve experienced is when I’m not willing to sit and stand in the moment that I’m present in. I call it future-tripping. When I’m future-tripping, it’s like, ‘If life was only like this! If only my dad hadn’t gotten his cancer diagnosis. If only the band hadn’t broken up. If only Nate and I hadn’t found ourselves in this predicament.’ When I stay present with what I currently have, and not what I don’t have, I feel a lot more clear-headed….

I do really love celebrating what I see in myself, the good, bad and ugly. And what I see in other women—the beauty and the absolute power, the terrifyingly wonderful thing that it is to be a woman. It’s a humanist record. It’s about everybody having the freedom to own who they are. That’s what I’m interested in. If what I make can become a mouthpiece for somebody else, then that’s icing on the cake.”